I didn't think I'd feel this way when we sold

We got an offer the other day. It was ok but not great. In the end they refused our counter and were going to walk. We choked back our pride and decided to accept the original offer so that we can move on.

The last eight months of having our house on the market have worn us down. Plus, last week we made a big decision which enables us to take less for the house. After trying so hard to negotiate a deal with DH's employer to get his transfer changed to allow him to go to Ottawa and failing to do so got us thinking about what we really want.

We really want to be able to buy DH's parents' house. We want to raise our family in that town. We know that DH's new work involves a lot of business trips so whether we are in Ottawa or Toronto I will be alone at least half the time with the kids. We know it will be so much better for me and the kids and our finances to just relocated to Ottawa now. So, we've decided that I am going to live in DH's parents' place with the kids. DH will find room and board accommodations in Toronto for work. He can work out his 3 year contract there and then he's free to move to Ottawa.

With the conditional sale of our house - they have until June 15th to remove their condition and then it becomes final - I find myself feeling an incredible mix of emotions.

I feel like I want to barf when I think of what a great price the buyers of this house are getting because they were real assholes to deal with.

I am nervous about DH having to travel so much for his job.

I am thrilled about getting to go home to Ottawa with the kids.

I am worried about how much of a toll this living apart half the time will take on our marriage.

I am relieved that I will have friends and family nearby to help me while DH is away.

I am frustrated that we had to take a huge loss on our house here to get it sold.

I am happy that it won't kill us financially now that we have worked out a good deal with DH's parents.

I am sad that may be nearing the end of our time in our very first home.

I want to move on but in a weird way I am kind of hoping the deal falls through so we can try to get more money for this house and deal with much nicer buyers.

I need time to let it sink in. When that happens I know I will be able to let go of the negative feelings I have about this sale and the turkeys we're selling it to. Only 8 days to go until we find out if we do indeed have a deal. Until then, I am sure these feelings and more will be swirling around in my head....I truly never expected to feel this way when we finally came to the point where the move could really happen. I thought I would just be happy and stressed about the details. I am surprised there is so much more there.